Posted by: alainnneart | July 21, 2009

If I am such a superhero why does it feel like my feel like my feet can’t leave the ground?

It’s the things that you never expect that usually blindside you at 3 o’clock on a Monday morning.  After all, you never expect to be fallible.  Or mortal.  Don’t we all think that we are going to live forever?

Reality is cold and crushing.  It comes in many forms.  It’s the reality of the doctor saying, “I’m sorry, there is nothing else we can do.”  It’s the reality of being hit by a car while driving to work.  Or even the reality of war, where people are killed for some reason that got lost a long time ago under mounds of bureaucratic bullshit.

For me?  It was simply making coffee.  This morning is cold and I was making coffee in my office at home.  I had planned to look over some paperwork, drive SC to school and head into the office.  However, all that changed, just because I was cold.

I stood leaning against the counter next to my coffee pot, waiting to hear the familiar and comforting gurgling as my little four-cup pot (which we all know is really about 2 cups) percolated and brewed.  A brief wind wafted through my window, which was open of my skinny cat to run in and out of.  Instinctively, like most women would do, I wrapped my arms around my breasts, because being braless and in a t-shirt was just plain cold.

That’s when I felt it.  The lump.  The lump protruding from side of my right breast. I gasped in shock and raised my right arm over my head, left arm diving under my black shirt.  I searched.  It was gone.  I shifted my fingers.  It was back.  Small and hard, the size of a frozen pea… the lump.

I suppose I am also a bit paranoid.  Could be a cyst brought on my hormones or even caffeine intake (I do drink a lot of coffee, don’t I?)  But knowing what I see every day made me worry enough to call my personal OBG and have an appointment made.  Because in this case, a second opinion is needed.



  1. Wow-What a freak-out moment! I’m so glad you didn’t wait to make that appt. Please keep me posted.

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